Alex
by weewuns
Summary: How did Alex become the monster he is today? Find out in this exciting prequel! RATED M for violence, language, Alex's dirty mind, and implied rape.
1. Chapter 1

Okay, I'd like to mention that I'm writing this on Malcolm McDowell's birthday (June 13). This is kind of a tribute to him for playing one of the best characters in film. Happy 70th birthday, Mr. McDowell! Also, I hope fans of both the book and the movie enjoy this!~

* * *

Alex DeLarge. One of the most controversial characters in literature and film. Many have proposed the idea that he has APD: Antisocial personality disorder. How did this happen, though? Well, you're about to see what out "Humble Narrator" never mentioned...

Alex DeLarge seemed to be perfect. He was an honor student, came from a good home, had wonderful friends. and was all around a great person to be around. He was everything Billyboy envied. Unlike Alex, Billyboy had miserable grades, lived in an abusive household, and didn't have any friends. These two were as far on the opposite side of the spectrum as possible._ But how could something so pure become tainted?_

* * *

_Can't wait for class to end already. _Alex thought to himself. Yeah, he was an honor student, but no one ever said that ALL honor students enjoyed school. In fact, Alex thought his intelligence was much more of curse than a blessing. He felt less like a person and more like a machine. Oh, the stress was killing him. It got so bad that he was even prescribed anti-depressants due to a suicide threat he made last fall. No one else knew of it other than his parents and the teachers. But now, he seemed to be better. On the outside, that is.

_*ring ring*_

_Oh, thank God._

"Class is dismissed."

As soon as he heard those words, Alex grabbed his stuff and darted out of the room. Another quite weekend was ahead of him. He made a final stop at his locker before leaving. Just as he exited the building, he was stopped by Billyboy.

"Hello, Alex~" Billy smiled.

"I'm not tutoring this weekend," Alex retorted.

"I'm not asking for tutoring."

"Well, what do you want? You never call me by my first name unless you want something."

"Well, there's one thing..."

_Great. _

"Be my droog? I don't know how to ask 'cause I've never had one before," Billy blushed.

_WHAT?!_

Alex was in shock. If he knew his Nadsat correctly, then this awkward douche-bag had just asked for his companionship. He didn't know how to feel about that. Finally, he broke his silence. "Fine, just don't be so-" _Annoying? _"...close. I feel you breathing on me. And for the love of God, take a mint."

Billy was overjoyed. So much so that he gave Alex a bone-crushing hug.

"...can't'...breathe..."

"Sorry Alex," he apologized as he let go of the smaller boy.

He put his hand on Billy's shoulder. "It's okay. I've got to get going now. So, uh, bye."

Alex then proceeded to walk home. Until he was stopped AGAIN by Billyboy.

"Hey, Alex! Wanna walk home together?"

Alex took a deep breath before answering. "Fine, I guess, but isn't your house over there?" He asked as he pointed to the other side of the school.

"Well, yeah, but me Pee's working late tonight and Em's probably passed out on the couch, pyahnitsa as usual," Billy replied. There seemed to be a bit of sadness in his voice.

Alex was well aware of Billy's home life. In fact, most people were; it was evident in the bruises and cuts. No wonder this kid was so lonely.

"I see," he said as he gestured Billy to walk with him. Billy just stood there. "Well, are you coming or not?" Alex laughed.

"Wait for me, droogie!" Billy yelled as he caught up to Alex.

* * *

It seemed like the beginning of a beautiful friendship... _How did it go wrong? _


	2. Chapter 2

First off, thank you to anyone who followed the story-*cough*Iloveyou*cough*- and second of all, Billy kind of becomes Annie Wilkes in this chapter. Heh heh, sorry 'bout that. 3XD Also, you'll find out more about Alex's suicide threat. I know you all wanted to hear about it.

Anyway, enough with my useless rambling; let's continue from where we left off~

* * *

"Wow, this is your domy?! It's real horrorshow!" Billyboy exclaimed.

"Glad you like it. I actually can't stand this place," Alex replied, slightly wincing.

"Why do you say that, droogie?" Billy asked, somewhat concerned.

"...I'll tell you when we get inside," he answered as he put his hand in his pocket, looking for the keys.

_Dammit, where are they?_ He thought to himself as checked his other pocket. _Not here either. Please don't tell me I lost them. _He softly cursed at himself under his breath. _Wait, there they are! _Alex mentally slapped himself as he opened the front door.

"I'm assuming you think the inside is more 'horrorshow' than the outside. Am I correct?" Alex asked as he locked the door behind him.

"Of course." Billy replied.

"Let's go up to my room. We can talk there," Alex suggested.

The two walked upstairs with only silence between them. When they got to Alex's room, they plopped on the bed and got right back to what really mattered.

"Now tell me why you hate it here."

"I'd rather not speak of it."

Suddenly, Billy looked Alex dead in the eyes.

Alex grew somewhat nervous. No one outside of his teachers, doctor, and parents knew. Well, that, and the fact that his new found 'droog' was glaring at him right in the eyes. He then stared at the floor before proceeding to speak. "I- it's nothing. I promise."

Before he realized it, Billy had put his hands on his shoulders.

"I know you're lying. C'mon, we're droogs. You can tell me!"

"I don't know how to tell you. But, I knew it was inevitable to bring this up again..." Alex breathed heavily as prepared himself to bring up bad memories. "...last year, when we were testing, I was becoming real stressed. It was killing me. I began questioning myself because I felt like I was trying too hard to impress everyone. And then I realized that I didn't want to live like this anymore. I-" *sob* "I didn't want to go on. So, I wrote a note to my parents telling them that I was going to end myself that night. And when they read it, they took me to the hospital. They tied me down to the bed for that night. The only thing drowning out the silence was my sobs and pleads for death. After that, I was diagnosed with depression. I began taking medicine for it, and for the time being, I was feeling better. But the meds stopped working, I never told anyone, accept you, I just go on, living a lie. I hide my pain, y'know. You're one of the few who's seen it. Now you can't tell this to anyone, okay? It's just between us droogs, alright?"

Billy was taken aback. The one human he admired & envied was just another broken soul, begging to be put out of his misery.

"Oh my Bog, Alex. I never knew. I'm sorry, shouldn't have asked. Please accept my appypolly loggy!" Billy felt truly guilty. He hated it when he was asked about his home life. He felt like he had just done the same thing to Alex.

"Apology accepted," Alex said as he wiped his tears. It had been a while since he cried.

The two friends then found themselves in a tight hug. Well, until Billy saw a familiar car driving slowly down the street. He quickly jerked away from Alex and grabbed his things.

"What's wrong? Why are you panicking?" Alex asked, worried about his friend.

"My Pee's on his way home. Assuming Em's still passed out, I have a chance to get back to the domy before him! Sorry, droogie, but I've got to go!"

And with that, Billy ran down stairs and out the back door. Alex watched as he jumped over the fence and ran. It seemed like both boys had their own dark obstacles to over come.

* * *

_Everything these two had gone through only strengthened their understanding of each other. But why did they have to become enemies..?_


	3. Chapter 3

Flashback time! This was inevitable, so I'm gonna get it out of the way. Hope you guys like this one!~

* * *

Alex was walking home from school, lost in the depths of his own mind. _Damn, I don't remember physics being that hard._

He had just finished an "evaluation exam". Ever since the new government came into power, school had become a million times harder. They even gave out these stupid tests at the beginning of the school year so they could see how much you remembered from last year! It was a miracle that Alex had the grades he did. He was probably one of the best students in the country. He had Mr. Deltoid to thank for that. Not only was the man intelligent, but he was also the closest thing Alex had to an uncle. ...an uncle who had given him sexual advice since he hit puberty. A strange fellow, he was. Alex usually brushed it off as a joke. A sick joke, but a joke.

_What? I'm already home. _*giggle* _I guess time flies when you're alone with nothing but your thoughts to keep you company~ _Alex smiled to himself as he unlocked the front door. As soon as he set his bag on the floor, he locked the door and ran upstairs. When he got to his room, he immediately began to play Beethoven's 9th Symphony. But even his 'Lovely Ludwig Van' couldn't cheer him up. There was just something about today that made Alex feel so depressed. He didn't know why though. Maybe it was his lack of self confidence that was hurting him. He didn't have a good feeling about the test. _Oh god, what if I failed? Pee and Em would hate me forever. Just the feeling of rejection is enough to kill me. It's something I've never known and I never want to experience. _The thirteen year-old began to sob. He was hurting himself with these toxic thoughts that ran through his head. He was driving himself down a destructive path. SELF-destructive, if you will.

Alex was already picturing the worst case scenario: _After failing the exam, he'd been abandoned on the streets. He patiently waited for death, but things only got worst. He was abducted and- oh god. It was a fate you would never wish upon your worst enemies._

Alex ran to the bathroom and threw up at the idea. _Pull yourself together, DeLarge! That would never happen! ...or at least, I pray to God that doesn't. _After calming down, he went back to his room and continued to cry for a little bit. How long? He lost track of time. It seemed like forever, though. These thoughts were consuming him. Alex could bear it no longer and wrote a small note. He then took it downstairs and pinned it to the refrigerator with a magnet. He grabbed a kitchen knife before heading back upstairs.

* * *

Phil had just gotten home when he heard Sheila crying in the kitchen. "Sheila? Are you alright, darling?!"

"Oh Phil." *sob* "Our baby.. He..."

"What? What happened to Alex?"

Sheila just handed him the note in response to his question. It read:

_Dear Em and Pee,  
I realized I'm too scared to know the feeling of failing you. I know deep inside, I failed the evaluation exam and I'm sorry. I just noticed, too, that I'm crying over failing a stupid government test. I guess I truly am that pathetic. I've recently been questioning my humanity. I don't feel like a person anymore. I feel like people only look at me as a 'genius' instead of me as a person.I'm sorry, but I can't continue living this lie. I love you both with all of my heart, but I have to do this. I'm ending it all at 7 PM tonight.  
Love, your son, Alex_

Phil looked at the clock as he held his hysterical wife.

_6:58 PM_

"Sheila, there's still hope! We have two minutes to save him!" He reassured her.

They quickly ran upstairs only to find the door to their son's room was locked.

"Alex, open this door now!" Phil demanded.

"I can't do that, Pee," Alex solemnly said.

"I'm getting into this room and that's final!"

*silence*

"Alex, please don't do this!" Sheila sobbed.

Phil decided he had no choice. He slammed into the door, causing it to bust open. There stood Alex, holding a knife to his wrist. His mother let out a bloodcurdling scream. His father stood there, absolutely shocked.

Alex felt guilty. His mother was horrified and his father seemed panicked. The guilt felt awful. He then dropped the knife and began to cry. "I'M SORRY. I'M SO SORRY." After he snapped out of it, he was rushed to the hospital.

* * *

The doctor ordered that Alex spend the night. His parents reluctantly agreed, but it'd be the only way to help their son. It hurt them to see him in such pain. All they could do was watch him in his hospital room, crying and pleading for death.

"GOD, WHY DON'T YOU JUST KILL ME NOW?! I'M NOT WORTH IT." This kept up for another fifteen minutes until Alex's voice wore out and he gave way to exhaustion. Thank God this all happened on a Friday night.

The next morning was hell, though. After he woke up and ate the breakfast the nurse had given him, he was taken to the hospital psychiatrist. After their talk, Alex was diagnosed with depression. When his parents heard, they were somewhat devastated. Why would their son be depressed? And then it hit them: it was the pressure. He was so young and they had been expecting so much out of him. On Monday, they informed Alex's teachers of the incident that occurred on Friday night. They'd have to be careful with him, knowing how fragile he truly was.

* * *

Was it his fragility that led him to his downfall..?


	4. Chapter 4

Ok, I'd like to apologize for such a long wait! Thank you all for your reviews, they mean a lot to me. I honestly just haven't had the urge to write recently, but then I decided that it's been too long since I've updated this story. Again, I'm sorry for such a long wait. This will probably be a short chapter, but I hope it can hold you guys and gals over for just a little bit longer until the next chapter. Enjoy!

* * *

_Shit! Pee'll be home at any minoota and I don't know how much longer I can run! _A million things were rushing through Billyboy's head as he dashed home. Why was it such a big deal for him to get home before his Pee? Simple: to avoid another beating. Granted, he would still be beaten even if he did get home on time. Hell, he'd still get a couple of bruises even he did nothing wrong. It was just the type of life he was born into.

Finally, he reached his house. Knowing his Pee would see if he went through the front door, Billyboy jumped over the fence and into the backyard. _Thank Bog, _he thought to himself, as he walked through the back door. The first thing to greet him: the pitiful sight of his mother, passed out on the couch. He let out a small sigh before waling over to the couch.

"Em? Are you sober? If you are, you don't have to pretend you're not. Pee's not home yet."

Of course there was no response. The woman was rarely sober around her son. She was the type of person who'd drink their problems away. And what a shame. She had potential. Well, until she married Billyboy's father. After that, she was abused and raped on a daily basis. And then she got pregnant with Billyboy. After he was born, she began to drink just so she couldn't feel the pain of, well, everything. An undesired child, an abusive husband, and just a sad life ahead of her.

At that moment, Billyboy's father walked through the front door. Billyboy froze as he saw his father. "Here. Now," his father commanded. Without hesitation, Billyboy silently walked over to his father, getting on his knees the way he usually did. Right then, he was slapped across the face. And the beating only got worse as time progressed...

* * *

Appy polly loggies for cutting it off so quickly, but I didn't want to go into disgusting detail, writing child abuse word-for-word. Besides, it gives all of you a chance to use your imagination. Just don't go too far with that, he doesn't die (considering that this IS a prequel), nor is he hospitalized. This was indeed a rushed chapter, but I wanted to get this one out as fast possible. Until next time, this is weewuns saying bye!~


	5. Chapter 5

Thank you all for your criticisms, they really mean a lot to me. :D

To answer some questions:  
bibliophilechild- This is indeed a prequel. I felt the urge to write one after reading a _certain piece of crap that will not be named.  
_TheWeasleyBoys- I actually didn't know that about overachievers... I actually didn't intend for that.

But, without further ado, the long awaited fifth chapter! (For those who like listening to music as they read, there's two excellent songs I'd recommend while reading the rest of this story: Home by Three Days Grace or Made of Stone by Evanescence.)

* * *

He was in a dark room, waiting for something. But what was he waiting for? Even if you asked him, he couldn't give you a definite answer. And then, it was there, whatever he was awaiting. But before anything could happen, he felt_ warm._ Like he was under a blanket, his head resting on something soft. That was when Alex shot up out of bed.

_Another trippy dream. Damn my subconscious, _ Alex thought to himself as he began to get out of bed, wincing as the sun hit his eyes.

_How long was I asleep? _He went to bed at about eleven, due to the fact that it was Friday night and his parents usually went off to parties, leaving him alone in the house until midnight. It was ten thirty when he woke up. That meant his parents already left for work.

After he got dressed and finished his morning, Alex went downstairs to take his pills before leaving.

Oh, the pills. Antidepressants to be exact. Alex hated them so much. To him, they were a constant reminder of that god-forsaken night. But he still had to take them. Even though they quit working a long time ago, but he wouldn't dare tell anyone that. Besides, the fact that no one could tell that they weren't working only proved that Alex was an excellent liar. _Well, liar is a strong word. Actor, maybe._ But back to the pills. He quit eating breakfast after he started them, a pretty bad side effect. If he forced himself to eat, he'd get nauseous. If he skipped breakfast, though, he'd be starving an hour later. Dammit, either way he couldn't win.

Alex glared at the two small pills. Just to get it over with, he tipped his head back as the two pills found their way into his mouth. Water soon followed as he swallowed his medication. After that bit of hell, he rushed out the door.

* * *

Sorry, my lovely audience, but I'm afraid I will have to cut this chapter short. Definitely no new chapters between Saturday and next Friday, so I'll try to squeeze one in tomorrow. Bye~


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